Nobody wins when everyone's losing,

Sometimes I think I'm the only sane one around me. That's a scary thought, because I'm one crazy son of a bitch. So, I'm crazy and yet everyone else seems to think that I should make a choice that goes against my moral code. So, the question becomes, which is more important? Honor and morality or Happiness? Obviously, I want both, but life doesn't work that way. So I have to choose. Well, I think I have to choose. I may not even have to choose at all because the situation that requires the choice may not even present itself. It's one of those "grab the bull by the horns" things. And bulls scare me. They're almost always angry and prone to impale skinny guys like me. I don't like being impaled.

If you couldn't tell by my inane rambling, this is in regards to my last post. Not the one on dreamsofmalice.blogspot.com (Plugged!), but the previous post, Awakening (song of the same name quoted). Honestly, I don't know what to think or do at this point. I think, as someone told me, I'm overthinking this and I'm letting it get to me far more than I should. I think there's something wrong with me. I was convinced I had given up my humanity years ago and that emotion wasn't something I had to concern myself with in my new evolved state.

Random glare for Spotify and its choice of songs to play at this moment (Bruno Mars).

So, yeah. I'm insane. I have a doctor's note to prove it. And speaking of insanity, the cause of all of this, that started my troubles to begin with years and years and years ago, well... I think it's time I ended that. Photography. It was one of the things that helped destroy my marriage. I obsessed too much about it. Even now, it caused the situation I'm in. I'll never be a real photographer. I'll never be successful at it. And it only seems to cause problems. So, probably time to pack it up and move along with life. Time always works against me anyway.